Murf made an interesting post for   in which he described an early relationship (that remarkably sounds much like most first relationships) and a fight that broke out between two guys vying for the same woman. These types of things happen to us all. At the end of his Murf asks if we’ve ever had a fight in our lives. I decided it was a good writing prompt, so here’s my ultimate fighting history:

I had “fights” more than once when I was in elementary school. I wasn’t quite the mouthy asshole that I am now, so from what I recall it ended up being more throw a punch or two and then fall on the ground in a writhing pile of body parts. None of those experiences really count as a fight in my opinion.

Later, when I was in high school, I had my first “real” fight. See I lived in a different area all the way up until high school, so the summer before high school started when I moved out here, I was still pretty much a loner. I didn’t know anyone; I played video games by myself. Eventually I made friends with some of the neighborhood kids, and one guy ended up being my best friend for a time. We used to play sports in the street when we weren’t gaming, so we gradually got to know everyone in the immediate area. My friend’s neighbor was our age and at first I thought he was a pretty cool guy. He was a skateboarder and less of a nerd, but still not entirely a popular guy either. Around the corner there was this family with 3 kids, the oldest brother use to play football and basketball with us (he was a senior my freshman year). The two younger sisters (one my age and the other a few years younger) used to socialize with us too but not as often. I had a huge crush on the sister that was my age, and it seemed that she liked me too for a time (hate to burst your bubble but she ended up being one of the “popular” girls and I never got my shot). The brother had a basketball court in their backyard, and one day me, my bff and his neighbor were all playing a game. Like typical teenagers we were all talking shit while we played, and eventually words came to a head with me and the neighbor getting into it.

He called me out, and I snapped. I punched, he fell, I dropped on top of him and wailed away. Someone pulled me off. His mouth was bleeding, my hand was bleeding (he had braces, ouch) he threw a bunch while I was being held back, and then the brother hit him, and kicked him out of the yard. I got approval from my crush. I felt like the king of the world. This wasn’t the last time we would fight.

A year or so passed, and we had let things be bygones. We were playing a game at my house, and we got mouthy again. This time I said something about wanting to hook up with his sister (but in a more crass fashion — she was hot though) and he snapped. This time he ended up doing better, getting me in a headlock and me being forced to randomly flail about trying to hit him. I don’t recall how it got broken up, but no real punches were thrown. Somehow in the scuffle, I ended up with a black eye. He looked fine. Knowing how high school works, I was getting a rash of shit for having gotten my “ass kicked” by that dude (he wasn’t particularly tough). That ended up getting me into my 3rd and final fight of high school.

One guy was ragging on me for so long about getting a black eye that I had my fill. We were at lunch, sitting across the table from each other. I stood up. He stood up. He said “what are you gonna do?” I pushed him, hard. He said “ok, it’s on,” and walked away. I never saw it coming. In P.E., we had to change into gym clothes and then go wait on the blacktop for our coaches to come out and direct us. I changed and was walking outside when I was blindsided by my rival. He hit me and I was so surprised I stumbled and fell, at which point he kicked me a couple times. He said something and walked away. I let him go. There were a lot of witnesses for this one and I was embarrassed. I really haven’t had a real fight since.

The next closest thing to a fight where I was a participant (otherwise I’ve only had verbal fights or been a bystander), happened about 6-7 years ago. I was at a house party and everyone there was someone I considered a friend. One guy was there that whom I had shared words with before, but nothing ever came of it, and I didn’t think of him as someone I disliked. This night was different. We were all drinking and having a good time, but there was some backstory where another guy and him had some beef, and I was mad that the other guy “wasn’t welcome” at this party because of it. I said something about the beef to the guy at the party, and that started it. He got loud, I got loud and we had a little shouting match. The host of the party stepped in and calmed us down, but it still didn’t seem like it was going to come to blows. Just a verbal, no big deal. Later, the host came back to me and asked if everything was all good. My foe was still standing within ear shot,  and heard me say that everything was fine because “he’s not gonna do shit.” That was my bad, cause sure enough, that guy dropped his beer and caught me in the jaw. Instantly the host was tackling the other dude and ramming him right into me, and then all of us crashed into the wall. I was in full rage mode, but the host dragged his friend outside and told him to leave. I ran out into the street and demanded that the host let him go so I could finish the job, but he refused and told me to go inside.

That doesn’t really even count as a fight, but it’s the closest thing I have from my adult life. I don’t like fighting. I’d prefer to talk things out. I don’t intend to have to fight ever again.

#blaugust